Romancing With Stone

Sexy, outspoken, and busier than ever, Hollywood bombshell Sharon Stone is the picture of enduring glamour. By treating her body with respect and bravely venturing into new territory, she’s back in the public eye with choice film roles and a high-end home line. And then there’s her sex life…

BY: Ruchel Louis Coetzee  PHOTOGRAPHY by: Fadil Berisha

Certain movie scenes unwittingly create indelible imprints on our psyche. One such imprint comes courtesy of our Basic Instinct cover model, who has since been immortalized in Hollywood for conjuring the ultimate fleeting image of seduction. Some 20 years after the filming of that iconic scene, the ever-sensual Sharon Stone continues to surprise. NEW YOU sat down with the award winning actress to discuss her secrets to staying healthy, her inner passions, her global fundraising efforts to battle AIDS, and, of course, her own basic instincts.

NEW YOU: What is your philosophy for healthy living today?

SHARON STONE: It begins with a state of mind. I think that many people try to make everything as difficult as they possibly can. You should try to take the philosophy of: What if it’s just easy? If you give up all the resistance and go ahead and forgive, resolve your issues, open your heart, stay in your compassion, sleep when you are supposed to sleep, eat when you are supposed to eat, exercise when you are supposed to exercise, show up on time for your jobs, keep your agreements, and live in your truth, you will have a healthy life.

NY: How do you juggle your busy work schedule, charitable work, and being a mom to three teenage boys?

SS: It’s the reality of life. Single mothers have been working with, and taking care of, children and families for centuries. I choose to have my children, and I don’t see anything unusual about being a working mother.

NY: Who has been a strong influence in your life?

SS: My father influenced my life greatly. He had tremendous integrity, dignity, chivalry, and the ability to grow until the day he died—which was really extraordinary to see. And I just love watching people who grow and change and develop. I think Hillary Clinton is a fascinating example of someone who is growing and developing. She’s working towards being more and giving more. Personally, I am very engaged with the Dalai Lama and the way he has changed the world. I also think music changes the world. It’s just beautiful the way that musicians will come together to help people in a time of crisis.

NY: What is your favorite “throw your diet out the window” snack?

SS: I don’t have that inappropriate relationship with food where I feel like I can and can’t have things. This is why I don’t have issues. I just eat what makes me feel well. I don’t overeat or eat what doesn’t make me feel well, or what makes me feel bad about myself. I don’t like to be fat or out of shape, so I eat a healthy diet. I think when you have a neurotic relationship with anything, it’s just going to bite you in the ass. Some people are like “Oh my God, I don’t eat meat. I just eat vegetables and fish!” If I just ate fish, I’d feel like I was starving to death, so I eat what makes me feel good. You have to feel your way through what makes you feel good for you, and you can’t tell someone what to eat.

NY: How do you know what is good for your body?

SS: I’m a Buddhist. I find that when you get still with yourself, you know just about anything you need to know. It takes quite a bit of discipline, and when you can get to that firm stance of stillness, people can’t really mess with you. I don’t want to tell other people that this is the thing for them. I can say this: I can hear my own thoughts and I can hear my own joy. I know that when things aren’t going well for me for a few days, I have to say, “I need to recommit to my happiness.” When I do that, it’s pretty easy to see anything that isn’t making me happy. If I’m not working out enough, not eating right, not being with the right people—whatever it is—it comes up like a red flag. You can’t turn those flags pink or white. They are just red flags, and you need to remove them. Just take ten deep breaths and you will know.

NY: When you walk down the red carpet, what goes through your mind? Do you feel a lot of pressure to be your Hollywood image?

SS: I don’t feel pressure. I feel a lot of gratitude—a lot of joy and energy that I’m not just engaging in a one-on-one relationship. Instead, I’m engaging in many relationships. It’s my job to put out some radiance and some light because people look to me for something inspirational. It’s important to give that light with grace, gratitude, and generosity, because people aren’t standing there in the rain or in some other discomfort to have someone not respect them.

NY: Can you share your best makeup tip?

SS: Don’t have the same old look all the time. One of the greatest things a makeup artist ever said to me was, “When people put on their base, they think they’re supposed to put it all over their face. You’re not painting the side of a barn. You don’t need base everywhere, and you don’t need ten pounds of it. You just need a little bit here and there.”

NY: It’s been said that many people look at themselves, but don’t actually see themselves anymore. Do you find that to be true?

SS: You have to sit down and take a good look at yourself, particularly as you grow older and your face changes. People are afraid of changing; that they’re losing something. They don’t understand that they are also gaining something. I thought I lost the deep vortex on my eyelid that you have when you’re younger, but I gained almost a kind of beautiful abyss. As I lost the fullness in my face, I got in these great cheekbones. I can’t tell you how many doctors try to sell me a facelift. I’ve even gone as far as having someone talk me into it, but when I went over and looked at pictures of myself, I thought, What are they going to lift? Yes, I have come close— but, frankly, I think that in the art of aging well there’s this sexuality to having those imperfections. It’s sensual.

NY: Is there a place for cosmetic surgery?

SS: Oh yeah. Are you kidding? If you have things that you want to fix, you should go right ahead and fix them. I don’t think there is anything wrong with cosmetic surgery at all. I think it’s great. But I don’t think it’s alright to distort yourself. You can’t treat an illness with cosmetic surgery, and that’s why it would be great if there were qualified therapists in plastic surgeons’ offices, and that people would go to a therapeutic meeting before plastic surgery. I think that should be part of the FDA requirement.

SS: Plan for it. Realize that when you are “middle aged” you have a chance for a whole second career, another love, another life. You may be sick of what you did the first half of your life, but you don’t just have to walk around and play golf or do nothing. We’re too young for that. It’s not like fifty is the new thirty. It’s like fifty is the new chapter.

 NY: How can people write the best possible chapter?

 SS: What do you want to do? Who do you want to be with? What kind of partner do you want to have? What kind of life do you want to live? What kind of job do you want? How would you like to contribute to society? These are the questions you should be asking. We know so much at this age, and people realize we’re the ones with experience. We’re a very colorful generation that is leading once again.

NY: What is your philosophy on Eastern medicine?

SS: I think it works as a combination. It helped my father live another seven years before he died from a different kind of cancer that was originally diagnosed.

NY: You have been the chair of global fundraising for the Foundation for AIDS Research, amfAR, for going on 18 years. What have you learned over that time?

SS: We’ve lost 34 million people to date, and there have certainly been years when I thought I was going to lose my mind. But we’re not close to [solving] anything. I’ve worked so much in hospices and hospitals and orphanages and laboratories.

In the beginning, I even put on hazmat suits to look at the AIDS virus under a microscope. It was emotionally crushing, and I realized I had to focus more on raising money for the scientists. I think you have to figure out what you can do and not get up and cry in front of everybody all the time. It was very important for me to teach people that they can have a joyful time during work.

To do that, I had to stay in my own joy. There was a point when I had to back out a little bit of going to every place where everyone was dying. But before I did that I had to educate myself. I had to see it all—experience it from every angle—so I knew what I was doing.

NY: What’s been one of the most touching moments you’ve experienced during your time with amfAR?

SS: Sometimes when I’m on location and can’t go home on holiday, I visit orphanages. One of these times I was in a nursery for AIDS babies, and one of the babies was just screaming and screaming. The nurse there was like, “There’s nothing we can do.” One of the other babies next to this screaming baby was in complete shutdown—just no communication whatsoever. I asked the nurse if I could try something, and she replied that I could.

I put the screaming baby in the crib with the baby who was noncommunicative, and the first baby stopped screaming. Then the noncommunicative baby touched the other baby and they found communication within each other.

That was special because these two babies were just in the worst, most desperate situations of their lives, and when they touched, they found something in each other that stopped the pain. It was a great moment—it was really beautiful.

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