Murray Bartlett of HBO’s Looking accepts the years as they come and insists on joy. Here, he talks home cooking, dream chasing, and dancing in the moonlight.
Handsome, healthy, and perpetually smiling Australian actor Murray Bartlett infuses charm and seismic talent into HBO’s Looking, a clever and true-to-life new series focused upon a circle of gay friends in San Francisco. Bartlett—a cast alumnus of All My Children, Farscape, and Guiding Light who has appeared in Damages, Sex and the City, and a host of indie films—takes his fitness seriously and his happiness even more so. Here, Bartlett shares the secrets of his enviable physique and the outlook that helps him thrive.
NEW YOU: How does playing Dom, your character on Looking, bring new dimension to your acting repertoire?
MURRAY BARTLETT: He’s very interesting, and will be familiar to anyone who’s lived through turning 40, experienced a mid-life crisis, or feared that he hasn’t never done anything substantial. He’s been caught up in partying, having sex, and being hedonistic—yet he had dreams of a career that’s about more than just getting by. He really thought he’d be in a relationship by now. He feels he has nothing to hold onto.
NY: How is your own life similar to, and different from, Dom’s?
MB: I’m definitely more mature than Dom in terms of having relationships, yet I’m in the same age bracket—I’m 42—so I understand the questions of, “Is what I’ve done with my life enough?” and “What do I want going forward?” Dom is no longer able to get away with the same things he used to by simply hiding behind his looks. I’d say Dom is like the neurotic part of my brain.
NY: Few series pilots get picked up—fewer still by HBO. Why did Looking work for the executives at the network?
MB: Our directors, Michael Lannan and Andrew Haigh, insist that we be as real as possible, and audiences really feel that. It’s a great concept for a show—and more than that, it’s timely, as was the film Weekend by Andrew Haigh. It’s the only recent show I can think of that’s focused on a gay group of friends other than Queer as Folk, and Looking is so different. When we’re filming, we’re really talking to each other. By doing this, the show invites universal identification.
NY: Did the show’s creators ask you to bulk up to play Dom, or did they just ask you to grow in the moustache?
MB: I grew the moustache during six months in Egypt last year, actually. I’ve been writing and producing projects with an Egyptian writer-director [Ahmed Ibrahim]. We were shooting a short film called Noor and developing a feature. So many Egyptian men have moustaches, and I wanted to feel like I fit in since I looked like such an outsider. I sent in my Looking audition tape with the moustache, and HBO really liked it, so I kept it. It’s a nod to the Castro in seventies San Francisco. Of course, my character is someone who works out and emphasizes his physicality, so I tried to make myself look as good as possible.
NY: Do you think there’s been an increase in the pressure men feel to look good compared to what it was, say, 10 years ago?
MB: There’s more pressure on men in terms of physical beauty, though it’s not the same as it is with women—which seems intense. But it’s stepped up. It seems only fair! Though there’s a dangerous side to putting an emphasis on looks. It can take over from more substantial concerns. At the same time, it’s great to be healthy and look after yourself.
NY: How do you maintain your physique and level of wellness?
MB: I ride my bike. It’s my only mode of transport. I also meditate, to keep connected with myself. I tend to work out by myself, though every year or so I’ll work with a trainer to shake off any rut. Years ago, I worked with a holistic trainer in Australia, who taught me his personal variation on the TRX-cable workouts. I love that this kind of training uses a lot of your own body weight and engages stabilizing muscles—the ones that really hurt and are tricky to get to. Enormous guys will come up to me at the gym and try these cables and they can’t hold themselves up, because they don’t regularly engage their full range of muscles.
NY: Do you watch what you eat, or can you eat anything?
MB: I used to be that type of guy, but not so much any more. I always want to enjoy my food, but I tend to eat super healthy. I cook all the time, and go for the best quality ingredients, from farms that operate as naturally as possible.
NY: You mentioned that you try to find time for meditation on a daily basis. When did your practice of reflection really take root in your life, and what is your philosophy of joy?
MB: The day before my 40th birthday, I was unsettled due to the milestone coming up. I was in Vieques, Puerto Rico at the time, and I forced myself to think about what’s important to me. Then and there, I decided to make choices to point me toward happiness— not to please others, or “do the right thing.” So here I am, in this beautiful place. There’s a super-moon in the sky. I’ve been invited by some local women to go to a party on a peninsula. We swim, we dance on the beach… It turns into a magical, unbelievable night that I never could have planned. I thought, If this is happening, I’m completely on track. It was a signpost to tell me I’m on the right path. Now, I only want to do things that make me happy—every single moment, as much as possible.
