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How Not to Be a Doormat

By Dontaira Terrell
Posted On Jun 06, 2016
How Not to Be a Doormat

It is okay to be there for others, but in the midst of it all, don’t forget to be there for yourself! Generally, we feel it is important to care for others before we take care of ourselves. As women, this is largely due to our nurturing nature because most women grew up with the guiding doctrine of being a nice girl. Living by the mantra, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

Unfortunately, many people take advantage and the kindness isn’t reciprocated. Wouldn’t you agree that we all should start treating ourselves with the same thoughtfulness and respect we unselfishly give to others?

Photo Credit: Shutter Stock
Photo Credit: Shutter Stock

Whether at home or in the workplace, let’s avoid fading into the background for the sake of others and start standing up for ourselves by clarifying goals and cultivating the right attitude in an authoritative yet tactful manner.

Sometimes things can get lost in translation and being in the center of a misunderstanding, confrontation, or uncomfortable situation is one of those very instances when “I should have said…” is the common phrase we playback time and again.

Photo Credit: Shutter Stock
Photo Credit: Shutter Stock

We can all agree to disagree that taking the high road in certain situations is always best for the sake of all parties involved. I must forewarn you that “taking the high road” not only requires the fearlessness to stand up for yourself but the ability to voice your concerns by following your own truth without guilt.

Whether you are unhappy with the way a conversation ended with one of your closest friends or personally feel that your mate is not helping enough with the daily household chores, be clear about what it is Y-O-U want. When voicing your thoughts, it is always best to be assertive without letting the feelings of anger or frustration get the best of you.

Make sure you have an end goal of what you would ideally like to accomplish during the conversation because you never know, you just might end up with something even better than you originally bargained for! Remember, each time you stand up for yourself, little by little you’re gaining back a sense of inner power, peace, self-control, and confidence. Not to mention, these tips will increase your stress reducing power and allow your internal being to grow from conflict.