2018 New You Beauty Awards - Powered by OmegaXL

Why Being “High Maintenance” Is a Good Thing

By Dontaira Terrell
Posted On Jun 10, 2016
Why Being “High Maintenance” Is a Good Thing

Can we please kick the words “high maintenance” to the curb? Ladies, knowing exactly what you want or truly desire in a relationship is definitely not a bad thing! If you are not satisfied in your relationship it is important to speak up instead of going with the flow. As we all know, communication is the key to building and sustaining a successful partnership. Because of this, voicing your concerns will more than likely improve your bond by serving as the missing ingredient to keeping the lines of communication open and honest. Still don’t believe me? Allow me to further explain.

“High maintenance” is generally associated with a woman who is never satisfied, requires a lot of attention, embodies high standards, and demands a lot out of life (including her man). Unfortunately, many women would much rather give off the false sense of having a laid back demeanor or possessing an “everything is cool” façade when something is not pleasing to them in their relationship. You may ask yourself why this is. The answer is quite simple; it is to avoid the stigma of being associated with the words “high maintenance.”

Personally speaking, I believe this phrase should be relinquished from our vocabulary because it makes women sound like a chore or a requirement. Similar to cleaning the house, doing the laundry, or washing the car. “She’s too high maintenance, run for the hills!”

Photo Credit: Shutter Stock
Photo Credit: Shutter Stock

There is no denying relationships take work, but honestly, if a guy truly cares he will (without a doubt) put in the work. Contrary to popular belief, most men are more than happy to go the extra mile, especially when it comes to making their lady happy. How else is your beau supposed to know your interests, what tickles your fancy, and the things you like/dislike if you continually hide your true feelings in fear of being labeled as high maintenance?

Truly expressing how you feel affects all aspects of the relationship from sex to dinner dates, and everything in between. Now, if the roles were reversed would men be considered “high maintenance?” Trust me, when a man feels a certain way about a particular situation, their opinions are voiced loud and clear! Easier said than done but ladies let’s cut ourselves some slack and allow ourselves the same liberties as men, shall we?

Photo Credit: Shutter Stock
Photo Credit: Shutter Stock

In order to be treated a certain way or get what you want from a relationship, you have to speak your mind. Want to make it official with the guy you’ve been dating? Aspire to marriage? Want more date nights? Whatever the case may be, these are not “high maintenance” behaviors but more like basic relationship rights.

Wouldn’t you much rather be with a guy who treats your feelings as sacred as you do? Or would you rather be with a guy who treats you and your feelings as if they are non-existent? If your mate does something that is not pleasing to you, let him know! Why pretend everything is A-OK but inside you’re blowing up at the seams? Being honest with yourself and with your partner can be scary because vulnerabilities and emotions are exposed. On the other hand, speaking your truth can actually help the relationship evolve in many ways.