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Are You Unlucky in Finding Love?

By Dontaira Terrell
Posted On May 03, 2016
Are You Unlucky in Finding Love?

Is there anything wrong with having a preference for the type of men you choose to date? Knowing what you want in a relationship is extremely important as it allows you the opportunity to set rules, guidelines, and expectations.

On the other hand, this could also be the very reason why many women such as myself are single. The fewer guys you are willing to date on the basis of not being your type only leads to fewer options made available to you! As you can see, this dating habit is more detrimental than beneficial in the quest for finding love.

Photo Credit: Shutter Stock
Photo Credit: Shutter Stock

Undoubtedly, once we become attracted to someone we begin a cycle of dating that same type over and over again. In the end, we continuously fall short but what if we began broadening our circle to dating the “non-type?”

Let’s take a step back and truthfully ask ourselves the question of what our type is exactly?  It is quite possible that we have no idea! As we mature, we create a specific prototype for the kind of man we’re searching for in our lives.

However, throughout the years, we consistently change and evolve. We are not the same woman we were five years ago or maybe even a year ago. Therefore, in all honesty, is it feasible to remain attracted to the same type of person we were attracted to years ago? Just think about it: you would more than likely be involved in a great relationship if your type was truly working out for the best.

It is also likely that the traits wheeling us into dating these certain types of men are also the same characteristics proving to be less than desirable or incompatible. I know at times dating can seem exasperating and very futile but if you consistently date the same kind you are not allowing yourself the opportunity to gain a useful experience through any of your relationships.

Photo Credit: Shutter Stock
Photo Credit: Shutter Stock

Next time, we should try dating the guy who isn’t as tall as we would like or the one who does not dress in a way that catches the eye. Regardless of how many bad romances, failed relationships, or horrible dates we have experienced we should be learning lessons from both the good and the bad.

Starting now, let’s stop ruling out the score of quality men out there based on the image of what the perfect man should be. Besides, what’s the harm in trying something new especially if the old hasn’t been working? As life coach, Marni Battista states, “having standards is necessary but keeping them broad is key.” Ladies, with that being said it’s time to step outside of our comfort zones and begin making the most of our dating experiences.