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Dating Dilemma: Should Women Make the First Move?

By Dontaira Terrell
Posted On Apr 05, 2016
Dating Dilemma: Should Women Make the First Move?

I’ve always been taught women NEVER make the first move when approaching a guy. I guess you can call me traditional in a sense as I have always abided by this rule. As I inch into the 30s club, I have finally realized that the cultural shift and gender dynamics have changed tremendously from our parents’ generation. The age-old code of conduct does not hold up like it used to. Women are making huge strides and taking the world by storm, running organizations, calling the shots, being the boss on their own terms, and serving as equals with their male counterparts. In all honesty, why should it be any different in the dating realm?

Some of the reasons why both men and women are fearful of approaching their potential love interest are due largely in part to internal confusion, self-doubt, and fear of embarrassment. Personally, a lot of my friends and I are in agreement when it comes to men and their approach to us; sadly it just doesn’t happen. As a result, during our girl talk discussions, many of my girlfriends have reveled in the fact they have initiated the first point of contact in order to snag their lover. You can only imagine my shock and disbelief when hearing this. Instantly, I thought to myself, “no way!” Then I realized, not being receptive to the new school dating rules is quite possibly one of the major factors contributing to my singleness. [Things that definitely make you go, hmmm.]

I can’t help but reflect back on numerous occasions of missed opportunities to approach someone I was interested in because I lived in fear of the 1940’s vintage rules my grandmothers instilled in me. Only recently have I come to the conclusion that with modern-day technology and the ideologies of the millennial generation the dating game is ever-changing. Why not take the bull by the horns and make it happen! Next time, my eyes narrow in on the hot guy in the corner I’m going to wear my confidence on my sleeve and make the first move. Who knows what will happen next but it could quite possibly lead to something magical and, either way, there is really nothing to lose.